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Hard Questions? Hard Answers. September 17, 2003

Posted by worldspectacle in Uncategorized.
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Bailey Blue For Governor

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The future governor of California, Bailey Blue, with yet another round of hard answers to hard questions:
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Miss Monica: Our readers would like to know Bailey’s response to CodePink�s criticism that he would turn back emancipation for women by relegating them exclusively to the home?

Bailey: @#%&^^@!!!

MM: What was that?

Bailey�s Spokesperson: That was caterwauling. Bailey doesn�t like your question.

MM: But isn�t it true that Bailey�s model calls for a one-man-one-woman domestic unit, with the man providing financial support and the woman providing cat care in the home?

BS: Yes. What�s wrong with that?

MM: But what about other domestic relationships. Say, two males?

BS: I don�t see your point. Bailey himself cohabitates with another male. He sees nothing wrong with that kind of arrangement, so long as the other male is neutered and stays in his side of the house.

MM: I mean � two human males.

BS: Do they have long fingernails?

MM: Um � not � necessarily.

BS: Do they have big feet and big black boots?

MM: � Perhaps.

BS: Bailey has been known to scratch and pee on that kind of male. He doesn�t really like them. But this is all beside the point. The most rewarding work on the planet is caring for kitties. So Bailey doesn�t see what your problem is. Those CodePink ladies need to get their priorities straight. They�re taking time away from what�s important, which is kitties, and spending it on issues that don�t concern Bailey.

MM: � That�s � that�s �. that�s �

BS: Look, granted people have issues like the budget deficit, illegal immigrants being given drivers� licenses, energy crises, and all of that. But, believe me, if you wake up and discover Bailey has left nuclear waste on your pillow, that puts it all in perspective!

MM: � all the time we have today.

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